Hi everyone, before you ask “omg is this another story about boobs?” Yeah, yes it is and with this story comes a few tips, pros, and cons on what life has been like living with big boobs.
I don’t like to say I am only me because of my boobs but my boobs have always been, in some way, a topic of discussion for me around others but they have taught me a few things… Like patience, because it can be ridiculously frustrating trying on 10 different tops that didn’t end up fitting because your chest was in the way, but like anything else in this great world, there is a bright side to living with big boobs and its as simple as THEY ROCK.
But for all the girls who think their lives would be better with bigger boobies, let
me tell you the truth about these double D’s.
1. FREE SHIT: When you’re waiting at the bar to order your drink for the night but the guy standing next to you already bought you one.
2. NO HAND HANDBAGS: They’re like two tiny purses when you don’t want to carry a real one. They’re good for holding your phone, your money, your dog, your boyfriend…basically anything.
3. RISQUE BUSINESS: It’s so easy to make an outfit or top look sexy for a GNO
or a date night. Crop tops = Nipple shot
4. SEXY SCHOOL GIRL: When you know the only reason you’re passing a class is because the professor is a huge peeeerv but ya double D’s got you multiple A’s.
5. DID YOU GET THEM DONE?: People always think “omg did she get a boob job” and I’m like “omg I’m so happy you think I have that much
1. BOOB SWEAT: Like all the time. Like in the winter, summer, spring, yeah its sweaty down there.
2. UNWARENTTED RISQUE BUSINESS: When you want to wear a casual top but it looks too sexy and you’re not digging it. Like trying to be casual by wearing a tank with jeans and flip flops but then you end up looking like a Coyote Ugly cast member.
3. READY FOR LIFT OFF: Like running? wtf is that? It’s like the only way God thought of getting back at us for having an amazing rack was to make running
4. DO NOT DISTURB PERV: For some reason, big boobs apparently come with an invisible sign that only creepy balding middle-aged men can read that says “STARE AT ME FOR AN EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE AMOUNT OF TIME AND MAKE ME WANT TO CALL 911”5. FORGIVE ME SHORT FRIENDS: Hugging is like a titty trap, once you’re in, it’s hard to get out.
So for all the girls out there, thinking that we can just walk around with big boobs and have no problems, wake up! It’s hell. It’s hard work but the perks are nice.
Tell me your big boob stories
– Adios Borrachxs 💋
MEET ALEISHA: @_arcavazos